Horror Passions

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Suicide Girls Must Die!: An Analysis
Published July 22, 2010, 9:54 am in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

Practically every day I’m adding something new and interesting to my Netflix queue that I am introduced to as a recommendation, hear about on the internet somewhere, or see scrawled on the bathroom wall of a truck stop in Tulsa.  The kicker is that I rarely check what is actually next in line to be sent to me, which means that every few days, I get surprised with what is inside that fancy little red envelope that arrived at my door.  To my mild amusement and total curiosity, I opened up the envelope to see Suicide Girls Must Die!, which is being touted as the first “reality” horror film.  That is probably why it made its way to my Netflix queue, it totally has nothing to do with the fact that it has attractive “alt” models gallivanting around and shooting a nude calendar for one of the biggest adult sites on the net.  Yeah, I mean, I barely know what the internet is… I can’t even read….

STENOGRAPHER NOTE: He’s right, he is completely illiterate.

A quick dash over to imdb.com during the opening credits shows that the viewers have spoken, and given the film a whopping 3.4 out of 10 as a rating (only 124 votes though).  This shocked me a little bit considering that the people who are going to watch this film are already well aware that they are going to see two very distinct things.  They know that there will definitely be nudity, as well as a reality show feel and look to the project.  You see, the whole story is being presented to us as a reality horror film, which sounds intriguing (that’s why I’m watching this, totally for science) [STENOGRAPHER’S NOTE: Poppascotch is making a dirty gesture involving various pieces of furniture in the room] enough for me to look into.  Little did I know however that the film would turn into an hour and forty minute long episode of Scare Tactics.

12 Suicide Girls are under the impression as they get shipped to a remote cabin in Maine that they are getting filmed for a future Suicide Girls video while also shooting a sexy calendar.  So right off of the bat you have 12 or 13 (the number of girls in on the joke is never given) girls who have no idea that they are going to be participants in the most elaborate and horrifying practical jokes that has even been captured on film. 

You see, the allure of shows like Scare Tactics, or even short video clips of practical jokes on youtube is that even thought the situations may be horrifying and cause the subjects blood pressure to rise exponentially, the fact of the matter is that the ordeal is taking place over a short period of time.  Say for example only a few hours at the most.  The film Suicide Girls Must Die! Is no way f**ks around with this concept and in all honesty takes it a bit far.  They put their girls up to the grueling challenge of having to internally deal with missing people for multiple days.  Really, take some time to process that.  You see, as the days go on and more and more people are being shot for the calendar, more girls start to disappear mysteriously while the girl in charge of keeping everything together doesn’t care that they’re gone.

That in and of itself is a really interesting part to the film that I’m glad was included.  Obviously some people participating had to be in on the joke, so the leader of the group, Sawa Suicide (I think that’s her name, they all have the same last name and like 8 of them look pretty much the same) constantly acts like the biggest jerk in the world saying that the girls probably just wondered off because they all had attitudes.  I won’t spoil any of the events for you because truth be told the people behind the scenes pulling all of the strings actually did a pretty good job at setting up a situation where help was not available to these girls at all.  However, this was about it for the horror elements of the story unfortunately.

There were a couple intercut scenes of girls being hacked up or getting hanged in trees, but they were all brief and really hurt the movie by taking you completely out of the story since everyone knows this thing is staged.  It’s as if they were thrown in there after filming when it was determined that the movie itself was very cyclical and redundant It quickly becomes agitating when the story seems to be running around in circles.  Something scary happens, then the girls yell at each other, something else scary happens, then the girls yell at each other, and so on and so on.

The beauty of a show like Scare Tactics is that a person is taken out of their world for a short period of time and given some good reasons to be scared and it’s funny to see their reaction.  The person may be a little embarrassed, but after having the relief of not dying today, they will get over it all pretty quickly.  However, in Suicide Girls Must Die, the charade goes on for five days. FIVE DAYS!  By the time the whole thing is over, the poor remaining girl has been completely put through the ringer of emotional pain and anguish for five whole days.  I mean we’re talking about someone’s physical well being here.  Think sleep deprivation, rampant alcoholism (almost every girl here drinks, which is awesome), and not to mention stress related illnesses and a lot of anxiety.  I mean sure the girls are young and their bodies can take it just fine, but still, five days of this?

By the end of it, I was very well aware that I was no longer watching a horror film.  It was marketed towards horror fans for the suicide girl’s relation to the alt horror community and well as men who like seeing said girls naked.  [STENOGRAPHER’S NOTE: Poppascotch is now appearing to simulate sex with a caged bird, no idea why] The problem is that the movie played more like a reality show, and I shouldn’t have to explain to you the horror communities’ low threshold for pop culture garbage.  So was the movie good?  No it wasn’t, but if you are one of the few people that are into the doldrums of reality shows (think Jersey Shore, the Hills, you know what, any show on MTV in the past 15 years or so) and also happen to like violent horror films as well as young chicks naked (like, a lot of naked), then this is the movie for you.  For the other 99% of horror fans, it’s isn’t worth the low score of 3.4 because honestly, they were experimenting with a format that no one had utilized like this before and I do applaud them for that, but it just doesn’t have a very wide audience.

Retro Rewatch: David Twohy's Below
Published July 22, 2010, 9:53 am in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

Retro Rewatch is an ongoing editorial that takes a look into certain films, conventions, crazes, and characters of the horror genre years after their heyday. It is an effort to try and put the magnifying glass up to the horror world with the much needed luxuries of time and perspective applied in order to fully understand the impact and social significance of these projects/themes/ideas (if any). So for this installment of Retro Rewatch, I present to you a much underappreciated ghost thriller with the film “Below”.

Most of you probably missed Below when it was first released back in 2002 in the shadow of a much more popular WWII submarine flick called U-571.  That’s completely understandable, and has probably caused you to go to this very day without ever seeing the movie.  Add that to the fact that it was dumped by Dimension films and went straight to DVD with no marketing and you have yourself a little film that doesn’t get the love it deserves.  This all happened despite the fact that it was directed by David Twohy, who also directed Pitch Black (which was a pretty big hit at the time that this film went into production).  Add that to the pen of Darren Aronofsky who co-wrote the film, but didn’t direct it due to the fact that he was busy directing Requiem for a Dream.  That seems like a few really good people working behind the scenes… so what happened?

I may fall into one of the smallest horror Sub sub-genres (HA!) which includes gore, a World War II setting, submarines (ha, you see how that thing I just laughed at and now it makes sense?  Yeah, you get it.  You’re awesome, smart, and attractive.)  and ghosts.  Now, do you see how that can appeal to a very limited group of people?  Usually with a film like this, at least one of two big names would be cast to spice up the pot and put a face on the poster, however that wasn’t the case here.  The biggest name was Matthew Davis, who was in Legally Blonde and Blue Crush (which I guess was a big deal at the time?) but has since gone on to be in Bloodrayne AND S. Darko.  This may be one of the reasons the movie was dumped, because it was essentially unmarketable, but as we all know, that doesn’t necessarily make it a bad movie.

So I’ve explained why this movie didn’t do so well, so I think now may be a good time to give yall a little synopsis.  On the Tiger Shark, a US submarine in service in WWII went on what was supposed to be a routine rescue mission, pulling three Allies out of the water after a British vessel was destroyed.  Once these new crew members come on board, strange occurrences start to happen causing terror and death amongst the crew.  So, essentially, there is a haunted WWII submarine that is slowly killing off the crew of the ship for reasons that remain untold for most of the feature.  I’ll be honest with you, if the combination of the words “haunting” and “WWII submarine” don’t interest you at all, then this isn’t the movie for you.  I on the other hand love the idea of setting the film in WWII

Not only does it make sense that people are actively engaging in underwater naval combat during WWII, but the fact that you add ghosts into the mix makes this feature something special.  Even today (in America at least) WWII is seen as one of the most massive military, economical, and societal changing event that has ever happened.  Stories from the front lines hold some kind of mythic quality, causing that guy that used to be the grocer at the edge of town, who has now cleared out an enemy machine gun nest all by himself.  These stories, though real seem like something out of an action film or a comic book and also evoke some kind of nostalgia going back to a time when the world was in peril, and in time, began to heal itself.  By adding the fire side element of telling ghost stories with the enclosed (haunted house) environment of a WWII submarine, you have a story that can be made that much more believable, i.e. sitting amongst a bunch of hard to conceptualize stories of heroics and sacrifice. 

Although I enjoy this film, I realize that many people may not find anything to associate with when they try to watch the story unfold, and that is a pretty normal feeling.  I however ask you to give it a chance, because at its core, Below is a pretty great ghost story with some genuinely chilling moments of terror that will keep you entertained throughout the entire film’s running time.  I never get tired of ghost stories and if you’re anything like me, you enjoy a smart little film that will scare you and also not pull you out of the world of the film.  Also, Zach Galifinakis is in the movie.  You know…. The bearded guy from “The Hangover”?  He’s starring in a movie with Robert Downey Jr.? (yes, ironman)… you still don’t know who I’m talking about? Really? 

Well then you’re a bad person because my boy ZG is the shit, and has been rocking that since I saw him on Comedy Central Presents back in 2000. Straight Up.

Is it a cult classic, a fitting analysis, or complete forgettable?:   It definitely isn’t a cult classic due to the fact that while though entertaining, it isn’t the greatest ghost story ever told.  It has a few complex thoughts and themes that I could spend a lot of time exploring so I’m going to go with a fitting analysis.  Hopefully you’ll work with me here to make sure it doesn’t get completely forgotten.

Robert Rodriguez Gives HorrorMovies.ca Readers Free Tacos!
Published July 22, 2010, 9:45 am in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

The folks working on Machete have passed along an invite they want us to extend to all the members of our community for free Tacos, Tequila and beer with Robert Rodrigeuz at Comic Con. So if you happen to be in the area your invite is below.

 

 

REVIEW: A Serbian Film
Published July 22, 2010, 9:35 am in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

Where to begin? Well, let's just say right off the bat that first-time director Srdjan Spasojevic's A Serbian Film - the centerpiece of Fantasia's Subversive Serbia Spotlight - will easily go down as one of the most controversial films of all time. It is repulsive, disturbing, and downright offensive and yet it is also very well-acted, has a brilliant electronic score composed by Sky Wikluh, and Spasojevic has a deft hand behind the camera that pushes the most disturbing scenes to the limit (often over the limit). What's it about, you ask?

Milos (Srdjan Todorovic, one of Serbia's most famous actors) is a retired porn star whose savings are dwindling and who is presented with the opportunity to make one last film so that he and his young family will be set for life. The catch? He's to star in the film without the benefit of even seeing a script and is to shoot his scenes as they unfold before him. The film's director, the mysterious Vukmir (Sergej Trifunovic, also among Serbia's most well-known actors) intends to make the most artistic porn film ever made. Milos' scenes grow weirder by the day, and when he attempts to quit the production he is drugged and wakes up covered in blood days later and attempts to piece together what has transpired. As he does so, and as the audience goes along for the ride, he begins a quick descent into madness and rage at what he has done and at what has been done to him. And then, after Milos seems to have avenged himself, we're thrown for another loop that nails home the whole point of the film.

Spasojevic, along with co-writer Aleksandar Radivojevic, has made a film with the sole intention of shocking their audience while delivering a little bit (okay, a whole lot) of social commentary. The point is for us to be bombarded by scene after explicit scene of the most vile and disturbing acts, to the point where we become as enraged as Milos in the final reels. At the film's Canadian premiere at Fantasia, the filmmakers explained that the whole thing is meant as a metaphor for what their country has been going through for a long time now, and that the frustration and anger and mental anguish that Milos experiences is akin to what Serbian citizens go through on a daily basis. This may be the sole redeeming value of A Serbian Film, but short of having the filmmakers attend every screening and explain it to them, audiences would have no idea, save for perhaps the title, that this piece of transgressive cinema has a deeper meaning than the atrocities they're witnessing up on the screen.

Spasojevic is a talented director and A Serbian Film is a technical achievement, to be sure, but ultimately that doesn't save it from being a film that doesn't know when to stop. Extremely intense and disturbing films like Gaspar Noe's Irreversible, Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury's Inside, and Pascal Laugier's Martyrs managed to be thought-provoking while toe-ing the line between good and bad taste, occasionally crossing it, but A Serbian Film takes a running start and long-jumps over that line in an attempt to parlay its social commentary. Is it important? Perhaps. Is it good? That's up to the individual viewer. Is it entertaining? Most certainly not. We'll leave it at that for now, except to say that if extreme sexual violence, snuff scenes, and the term "newborn porn" are your idea of entertaining cinema, then by all means seek this one out. Don't say you haven't been warned, though.

originally reviewed on www.ioncinema.com 

Yahoos New Exclusive BURIED Trailer
Published July 22, 2010, 7:45 am in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

Yahoo Movies has been given an exclusive new trailer for the upcoming Suspense/Thriller Buried from Lionsgate starring Ryan Reynolds, it has been scheduled to be released on Friday, Ocober 8th 2010! This movie looks promising even if the premise of someone being buried alive has been done time and time before, but hopefully director Rodrigo Cortés can pull it off.

Synopsis: "Paul Conroy is not ready to die. But when he wakes up 6 feet underground with no idea of who put him there or why, life for the truck driver and family man instantly becomes a hellish struggle for survival. Buried with only a cell phone and a lighter, his contact with the outside world and ability to piece together clues that could help him discover his location are maddeningly limited. Poor reception, a rapidly draining battery, and a dwindling oxygen supply become his worst enemies in a tightly confined race against time- fighting panic, despair and delirium, Paul has only 90 minutes to be rescued before his worst nightmare comes true." Check out the trailer below:

Gruesome Walking Dead Photos Ask a Question
Published July 22, 2010, 7:40 am in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

Below from DreadCentral you can checkout some gruesome photos from the booth for AMC's Walking Dead which really invites the question what was so wrong with Piranha 3d? It wasnt allowed to be at Comic Con because it was to gorey but yet this booth isnt? Checkout a couple of the photos below.

 

 

 

First Photo from Nicolas Cages Drive Angry
Published July 22, 2010, 7:35 am in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

From Fangoria comes more details on Nicolas Cages DRIVE ANGRY 3D. If you are lucky enough to be at this year's Comic-Con check out Drive Angry (Friday at 11:15 in Hall H) Check out the photo of Nicolas Cage to the right. Official synopsis:

"In the newest 3D action-adventure from the director of MY BLOODY VALENTINE, DRIVE ANGRY stars Nicolas Cage as Milton, a hardened felon who has broken out of hell for one last chance at redemption. Intent on stopping a vicious cult who murdered his daughter, he has three days to stop them before they sacrifice her baby beneath a full moon.

He's joined by Piper (Amber Heard) – a young, sexy waitress who liberates her ex-boyfriend's cherry-red muscle car in order to help Milton. Now, the two of them are hot on the trail of the deadly leader of the cult, Jonah King (Billy Burke), who believes it is his destiny to use the baby to unleash hell on earth.

But the bloodthirsty cult is the least of Milton's problems. The police are after him too. And worse, an enigmatic killer known only as "The Accountant" – who has been sent by the Devil to retrieve Milton and deliver him back to hell. With wicked cunning and hypnotic savagery, the Accountant will relentlessly pursue Milton at high speed across the country until his mission is accomplished.

Fueled by high octane and pure rage, Milton must use his anger to go beyond all human limits to avenge his daughter’s murder, before his last chance at redemption is revoked."

Here's to me hoping it will turn out to be Rated-R with some awesome over the top gore scenes and hopefully a few body projectiles flying at the screen in 3-D? One can dream... Drive Angry is scheduled to be released by Summit Entertainment on February 11th, 2010

Brad Pitt To Star in World War Z Movie
Published July 22, 2010, 7:33 am in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

From MTV and Bloody-Disgusting, it is confirmed that the awesome novel World War Z will adapted into an upcoming film but not only that but the author Max Brooks also confirmed that Brad Pitt is official attached to the movie! The book is a 2006 novel, which is a follow up to Max Brooks The Zombie Survival Guide, World War Z consists of a collection of individual accounts in a first-person style abecdote.

Brooks plays the part of an agent for the United Nations Postwar Commission, as the true origin of the virus is unknown the story takes place in China after a zombie from a previous outbreak bites a boy.

The chinese government tries to mask the outbreak and increased military involvement, it soon outbreaks into Cape Town and South Africa and soon becomes a Global outbreak. It is a great Post-Apocalyptic tale and i recommend you hunt it down if you haven't already, and the official announcement of this being adapted into a movie has got me stoked!

New Resident Evil Afterlife Movie Photos Arrive
Published July 21, 2010, 2:24 pm in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

IGN has a couple of new photos for the upcoming Resident Evil Afterlife movie for your zombie loving needs. Checkout one below and click on it to head over to IGN and git some more! In a world ravaged by a virus infection, turning its victims into the Undead, Alice continues on her journey to find survivors and lead them to safety. Her deadly battle with the Umbrella Corporation reaches new heights, but Alice gets some unexpected help from an old friend.

A new lead that promises a safe haven from the Undead leads them to Los Angeles, but when they arrive the city is overrun by thousands of Undead and Alice and her comrades are about to step into a deadly trap.

Mirrors 2 DVD Date & Details
Published July 21, 2010, 2:14 pm in Horror-Movies.ca! Tags:

Arriving on DVD and Blu-ray October 19 from Fox Home Entertainment is Mirror II
Having watched the original movie Into the Mirror, i was skeptical about Alexandre Aja's remake Mirrors but i was pleasently surprised as the entire story was nearly changed, excluding the premise of the idea of using mirror's and one or two scenes where the same.

I was taken back as i wasn't expecting much, as remakes go these days they usually miss the mark, but thankfully Alexandre took his own spin on the original idea and added some awesome special-fx scenes for example the bloody bath-tub scene!

Now Mirrors II will arrive later this year direct to DVD, although this time it is helmed by Victor Garcia and i have high hopes for this movie aslong it doesn't drift away from what made the remake succesful.

Synopsis: "When MAX, a recovering addict, takes a job as a night time security guard job at his father’s department store, he begins to see visions of a young woman in the store’s mirrors. Unsure whether his visions are side effects of his prescription sleeping pills or actual reality, he begins to look deeper into the source of the images in the mirrors. When employees of the store turn up dead and Max is a suspect in the murders, he must expose the girl’s connection to a scandal within the department store’s walls in order to prove his innocence and put a stop to the spirits in the mirrors."

Milo
Published July 21, 2010, 11:59 am in FEARnet: Free Movies Tags:
Remember that really weird little kid we used to play with when we were nine? You know,the one who murdered the girl from our class. Yeah,thats the one. Well guess what? Hes back. And hes coming...



Hostel: Part 2 - Director's Cut
Published July 21, 2010, 11:56 am in FEARnet: Free Movies Tags:
Some American coeds are lured into a Slovakian hostel for a Sexy Disco Party Time!  Sadly, "Sexy Disco Party Time" means "Screaming Torture Murder Time" in Slovakian.



Toolbox Murders
Published July 21, 2010, 11:54 am in FEARnet: Free Movies Tags:
A young couple moves into a rundown old apartment building. They eagerly start fixing it up, but with the renovations comes a spate of horrible gruesome killings. Directed by Tobe Hooper –...



Simon Says
Published July 21, 2010, 11:53 am in FEARnet: Free Movies Tags:
College friends spend vacation camping out and raising hell, but they cross paths with two insane twins. Soon, the psycho brothers begin to slaughter the campers in creative and gruesome...



A Real Friend
Published July 21, 2010, 11:52 am in FEARnet: Free Movies Tags:
 A young girl creates imaginary friends thru her love of fantasy and horror stories. One day, she makes friends with a new companion, a vampire. But could it be that this 'friend' is...